Whitney Houston is a worthless, lying piece of garbage. No, I’m not talking about her recent meltdowns with the crack pipe or her bearded sham of a marriage to an abusive Bobby Brown. What did the five fingers say to the face!?! I am talking about the lyrics to her song “The Greatest Love of All,” chiefly the last four laughable lines of the chorus:
I believe the children are our are future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be
Everybody searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfill my needs
A lonely place to be
So I learned to depend on me
Chorus:
I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows I
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I'll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all
The fuck? Besides this song making me want to puke every time I hear it – I mean come on, who doesn’t know the future will be composed of our children? But seriously, where do you get off saying that “the greatest love of all is easy to achieve.” Do you know how many depressed people struggle with the ability to love themselves? To just get out of bed in the morning and face the mirror? “Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be?” How about I go start a tickle fight with my cranky, ex-girlfriend or make mud pies with my noxious landlord when the downstairs neighbors won’t stop parking their car in my spot. How about I take my dick and throw it in your ear world!?!?!?
Ladies and gentleman, I give you the fucking Care Bear Stare. “Learning to love yourself is not that easy.” Life sucks. Then you die.
I'm going to go drink until I shit myself.
Have a nice weekend.
--- Cartola
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